Tuesday, July 24, 2012

It's My Birthday!

My birthday was such an eye opening experience!

I woke up at 5 a.m. because my boss was picking me up so that I could borrow his car for the week. I was going to observe MPD training over at Rollins College for the week so I needed transportation and being that I turned 21 some car rental places do not allow people to rent until they are 25 along with other complications, so my boss was going to let me borrow his car while I dropped him off at the rental place to rent the car. I dropped him off and rushed over to Rollins to meet up with the coach I would be observing.

MPD training was fascinating to observe (both research wise and personally considering my future) and a great gift was being able to see Mary and Alex from TU who are in new staff training to go to Italy! They knew it was my birthday so they took me out to lunch where we had a break. I finished observing went to Monday Night Meeting where they awkwardly sang happy birthday (that was a theme this year, lots of really weird happy birthday renditions). Our speaker happened to be an ITG (tech person) who use to be a magician! So I had my very own magic show for my birthday. The girls in my house also made me a little booklet with personal notes and "21 Things We Love About Elise" which was the sole gift I got and I loved it! The girls also went out to fro yo afterwards and my house decided to share our personal journeys until I finally went to bed at 11:30 because I had to get up at 6 the next morning.

So there were lots of little blessings throughout the day which was delightful. This birthday was a lot different than in the past. 1) My family was not there. 2) None of my friends were near me 3) My love language is gifts and the only gift I actually got on my birthday was the booklet (a family friend and my grandma sent me gifts but those didn't come until the next day).

That last one was a really hard struggle for me. Birthday and Christmas are really the only time people give me gifts so in my mind they are a big deal. People telling me they love me by the gifts I receive. But this year I was not near friends or family. I had to battle with my selfish desire to feel loved by those directly around me and also feeling like no one outside loved me. I put way too much thought into gifts and God really showed me that in the days leading up to my birthday.

I need to realize that people will fail, people won't give me gifts and they won't show me love all the time. But God shows me love, grace, humility, all gifts I don't deserve yet He gifts freely and abundantly. I need to see love and appreciate it, not trying to have love fit my needs, because love fills me. Gifts can be in many different ways and from different people, I just need to see them as from God. God loves me, HE LOVES ME! That is enough, that is more than enough! Others love is secondary to God's love. How can I love if I do not see and appreciate God's love for me?

My birthday was more of a gift than I could imagine. God granted me insight and clarity into love. Who can ask for a better birthday?

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